Wedding Anniversary

One of the wonderful benefits of one to one sessions is that I get to witness how the clients encounter day to day dilemmas, explore possibilities, and find ways to get more of what they want with the least amount of pressure. They create a quality experience with the lowest cost of time and energy. They practice how to use simple applications to complex situations.

Here is what Anne told me about her wedding anniversary:

This week Anne said that she was having one of the best anniversaries ever. Richard, her husband, and she had planned a romantic day of breakfast in bed and a slow, leisurely ride followed with dinner and dancing. Last year she had broken her arm the day before their anniversary so they were really looking forward to this year.

Anne and Richard finished their breakfast in bed, cozy and easy. Somewhere in the middle of their ride, Richard heard a strange noise coming from the rear end of their car. They returned home and decided to take Richard’s car to the mechanic who that the wheel bearing needed to be replaced.

Both of them walked outside and stood looking at each other. They spent over one hour at the shop while Richard’s car was being diagnosed. Anne’s car was in the shop for maintenance and was not ready for more than two hours. Now what to do?

Anne said they walked to a nearby coffee shop. Sitting at the table, both of them sat silently. Anne felt really disappointed that another anniversary was “doomed.” Midway through her cup of coffee, she told me that she remembered to ask herself what she wanted.

Suddenly, she turned to Richard. “I have an idea. We could have an anniversary week. That way we can count our romantic breakfast, get the cars done, and then go to dinner another day. How does that fit?”

Richard exhaled and said, “That makes me feel more relaxed to add more time instead of working so hard to make this day perfect for us. It’s kind of like trying to catch water that is going down the drain. Thanks, Honey. Great idea.”

Anne said that she had this year turned out to be the best anniversary she could remember. Both of us got more of what we wanted.  She smiled.

While We Wait…

Standing in line, waiting on the telephone, and sitting until someone calls out name—so much of your time is spent not doing what you want immediately.  So, what if you use those minutes as free time?  Since you use a certain number of minutes to get what you want, you might consider the time as a gift of time for things you postpone.  Then you can get even more of what you want.

For instance, you can carry a notebook with you and write poetry, ideas for a new quilt, a movie you want to see, the plot for your next short story, or a design for a bookcase or walkway.  You can carry a small digital camera or use the one in your cell phone and watch for photographic options: birds, flowers, an old shoe, an empty chair, water puddle, or fence post.  Maybe you’d rather carry a book, gardening magazine, crossword puzzle, Italian cooking magazine, automobile magazine, or guitar sheet music.

Rather than press yourself to multi-task with work and “to do” lists, give yourself permission to invest these moments in you.  Give yourself a break, exhale, and relax.  Some of the “If I only had time, I would…” can happen in your waiting time—you can enjoy that time in a way that pleases you.

You may not always have a great deal of choice in how long it takes for things to happen.  You do have a choice of what you do while you wait. You have a choice of whether you count the minutes you wait or appreciate the extra time for yourself.

The added bonus is that you will create a new brain connection.   Your brain will learn to connect free minutes with time for you.   You can have fun finding creative ways to use your waiting minutes. You can dedicate more time taking care of yourself, easing your stress, and finding more peace in our day to day living.   Enjoy.

Let me know how you spend your free minutes….

Searching for Our Center

Yesterday while out for a drive and soft taco, I came to a small open field and saw about fourteen people standing beside three homemade crosses planted in the ground.  Upon each cross a young man wrapped in a white cloth around his hips was fastened.  I stopped and watched.

At the same moment on the public radio station, Vigen Guroian read from his book, The Fragrance of God and that nature is the scripture for remembering our faith.  He described all of us looking to recreate the Garden of Eden with the fruit and flowers we grow.

I am thinking how many people are looking for ways to have their dreams, hopes, and wishes be real and whole.  How many are asking for a life with less pressure and more beauty.  In both of these scenes, one in a field of dirt and the other in a fragrant garden, people look to symbols of faith and peace.  They watch for signs of change—of new and renewed possibilities.

Getting more of what you want in life….

Welcome to the Living Step By Step blog about finding solutions to whatever gets in the way of taking care of yourself and having the life you really want.  You’ll read about real life people and how they give themselves permission to change their lives.  You’ll find tools and strategies that help you balance your personal and professional life.  Living Step By Step is the art and science of living—wisdom with a personal touch.